tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2074838946965393539.post3925635532457798572..comments2023-10-31T08:19:54.708-07:00Comments on Five by Five: On Loneliness: Social Mediabalyienhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13785839636620293326noreply@blogger.comBlogger3125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2074838946965393539.post-9200004644976560752015-01-11T16:06:39.062-08:002015-01-11T16:06:39.062-08:00I think the reason that I sometimes get depressed ...I think the reason that I sometimes get depressed by all the cool stuff other people are doing is because it feeds into the part of me that fears that no one really likes me. For example, I start to think, "Well, why are they doing that with that person? Why didn't they invite me?" It's something that I understand isn't rational, and that I know is MY issue. It's certainly no one else's fault. It's something I need to get right inside of me.<br /><br />I'm still on the fence about social media. It's difficult to weigh the pros and cons, and to figure out if my issues with it are things I can fix or if they can only be fixed by staying away from it.<br /><br />Courtney, thanks for the kudos and for sharing my book. :) I really appreciate it! I agree that our culture doesn't respect "being." There's a lot of cultural pressure to always be "doing." It can be really frustrating!<br /><br />Patricia, I get caught up on the "like" issue too! Then I feel silly. Ten years ago, hardly anyone would have even seen my pictures let alone bothered to tell me how much they liked them. It's a brave new world, I guess.balyienhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13785839636620293326noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2074838946965393539.post-9294077375679232212015-01-06T15:55:45.420-08:002015-01-06T15:55:45.420-08:00I have never gotten on social media and felt depre...I have never gotten on social media and felt depressed about all the things people are doing that I'm not. I'm okay with how I spend my days, I guess. Where I get weird about social media is the number of "likes" I get. A normal number is maybe five and some of my posts get no responses at all. I can get caught up in a bad loop of "Oh [friend we have in common that you know exactly who I am talking about] has 46 likes and 13 comments on her post and I have three. <br /><br />So that's not so good.<br /><br />I have some friends I only interact with on social media and I'm happy to find them there, because if not there, there would be nowhere in my life. It also lets me keep tabs on acquaintances I'm "friends" with. (How I loathe the improper use of that word.) I find it interesting that I have different levels of disclosure. I say all sorts of things on my bog I would never say on Facebook, because I feel much less exposed on the blog, even though the blog uses my real name and Facebook uses a pseudonym. <br /><br />And I too, write more real things in letters than I do either on the blog or social media.<br /><br />My other problem is keeping up with things. Sometimes it's hard to catch up after a few days away, like after the weekend, and Twitter is the worst because it won't go back to where I was. So I have to scroll back and back and back and back to pick up the feed. I could alleviate this by being on Twitter more, but that's not really a solution.<br /><br />Good post!Patriciahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07967372439743853589noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2074838946965393539.post-7852243693555770142014-12-31T15:14:52.724-08:002014-12-31T15:14:52.724-08:00Jan, I so relate to what you're saying. One fr...Jan, I so relate to what you're saying. One friend of mine called out of the blue and told me that her therapist wanted her to stay off social media because it helped feed her depression. I've enjoyed connecting w/ people I would never otherwise know and I love some of the FB groups I'm involved with (did you get the link for the 10 minute novelists group I posted?), but it can be depressing to constantly hear about the great things in other people's lives. Social media is like a billboard, so you wouldn't normally share your depressing, boring, or painful moments with people, yet sometimes those are the posts that move me the most. They show what's real under the surface, those "dark night of the soul" feelings and experiences that everyone has. <br /><br />Congrats on your book! I think it's very cool that you finished it and got it out to the world. I'm sharing the link w/ my husband. I also feel a love/hate relationship w/ my Maui Jungalow blog. I enjoy blogging but the more I know about blogging and interact w/ other bloggers, sometimes I feel this pressure to "be good" or professional or popular and then I feel like I sometimes need a break from that and from social media, just to get away from expectations. Also, I think it can be a good thing for you to stay home sometimes and read and watch tv and do homebody things, because it can be a form of "self-care." Giving yourself time to unwind without having to rush or achieve or do things, can actually allow some deep inner creativity to happen that may not be apparent on the surface. We are in a culture of doing that often doesn't respect being.Courtneyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05292408696265388415noreply@blogger.com